Ted Talk 132: Why Do I Find It So Hard To Lose Weight? (And How To Fix It)

Podcast Transcription: Why Do I Find It So Hard To Lose Weight? (And How To Fix It) 

Ted Ryce: I want to ask you: have you ever been in a situation where you felt the same way? You’re like, “It’s hopeless, man. It’s going bad, man, this isn’t going well. It’s not gonna go well, everything’s just going the wrong direction. And I’m really trying here, but nothing I’m doing is working. I’m overwhelmed.” And then you made a switch. And then you’re like, “Whoa, there’s something about the feeling, the vibe.” And I’m trying to put my finger on it, but it’s so… And I’m going to share a few things with you. Because I’m hoping I can help you if you’re feeling like you’re in a situation I was in. Because I want you to know that situation that feels so hopeless, so desperate, so terrible. So like, “There’s no way out of this. Oh my God, my life is over.”

The doom and gloom thinking, that’s where I was going. And then poof, it all went away. I don’t I don’t have it at all. I’m super excited now. All because I changed my environment. And again, I’m going to try to figure out with you right now, what it was that made so much of a difference.

Now, one thing is just the novelty. I changed environments, and it’s a new environment. But listen, I was in Vero Beach, Florida in a place renting a place, and then I changed to Fort Pierce, Florida and a nicer a bigger place that was nicer, the couches were great, 17-minute walk from the ocean. But it wasn’t enough. It made me feel a little bit better. But it wasn’t the solution to my problem that I was looking for.

And if that’s true, then what is it about this place? First of all, there is novelty, but it’s not just that.

One thing that I’ve learned that is part of my recipe for success is I need to make it super easy for me to do cardio. I’m a weightlifting guy. I like actually not even weightlifting that much. I like martial arts. But a martial art is hard on my body. I don’t want to go and lift weights all the time, I’d rather do martial arts. But I find cardio kind of boring. But what I found is that even though it’s boring, if I do some in the morning, oh my gosh, it puts me on the next level.

In fact, I’ve done 35 minutes of cardio today, I did 40 minutes of cardio yesterday. And here’s the key distinction. I want you to think about your situation as I talk about this.

But I was doing cardio in Fort Pierce, Florida, but I didn’t have a gym with cardio machines, and I have knee issues. So, I’d go and take a walk. But it wasn’t challenging enough. I’d go for a run, but then I’d feel my knees. And also, it was brutally hot, so I had to run outside or walk outside. And not even the heat, I can deal with the heat, but it was a sun on my skin that was just crushing, and I don’t want to get skin cancer.

I believe in sun exposure. I believe you should get some but too much is not good. In fact, I got a little sunburn on my balding head started having some peeling of my skin or my scalp, you know the part that’s being exposed for the first time in my life really, right?

So, what I’m getting at is this: I had a sun exposure there, I had exercise, but it wasn’t…I figured out what I needed, I need to be in a place with cardio machines, so I can make it super easy. I just go downstairs, I walk on the treadmill, hop on the elliptical, do my time and leave and make it super easy.

But I’ll ask you this, are you making exercise easy for you? First of all, let me say this: this is a post that I made on social media this morning, I said, “You may think that I’m exercising—I did a video, I was showing people, “Hey, you may think I’m exercising and technically you’re correct. But what I’m really doing is setting myself up to win.”

Because I know part of my success routine is hitting some exercise every day, if I can most days of the week, and specifically cardio, getting my sweat on getting my heart rate up. I feel amazing when I do that. In fact, if you’re more of a weightlifter and you’re like, “cardio isn’t for me,” but you can’t walk 10 flights of stairs without feeling like you’re about to have a heart attack, experiment with upping your cardio.

I’m not saying to do less weights, although do less weights if you can’t fit the cardio in, in addition to your weightlifting, but fit that cardio in, I think you’ll be surprised at how it’ll shift your mood and help you psychologically.

In fact, shout out to Jeff, who is one of my best transformations ever. He’s at 9% body fat. One of the things that he was asking, he’s like, “Hey, I go for a run every morning” or every day. I don’t know if he does it in the morning or not. But I go for a run every day. Can I keep that in?

And I was like, “Hell, yeah. If you’re feeling good, if your joints are feeling good, if it’s not excessive…” And he only runs, I think, 20 or 30 minutes. So that’s part of his success, is that frequent exercise—just 20 minutes, I think, it was for him. And me too, I spent 35 minutes today, but you don’t have to but if you can spend 15 minutes, 20 minutes, just to get your heart rate up, it makes getting leaner so much easier. And it’s not because you burn the calories, but you feel better psychologically.

Which brings me to the next issue is, one of the things I was struggling with in Florida was that I was emotionally eating. I knew what to do. I couldn’t stop myself from doing it. I would be in the grocery store. I’m like, “Hmm, I’m going to buy these key lime pies or should I get the brownie brittle? Or should I get the Oreo cookies and cream ice cream?” And I was doing all this bargaining with myself, like, “Oh, which one has the least amount of calories for the entire serving? What’s the smallest serving I could get?” so on and so forth.

But it was like, why do I feel like I need that? I don’t know. I just did. But I switched environments. Over here, I went food shopping last night. I didn’t have to use any willpower at all.

In fact, I made another social media post, that basically said, Here’s the fat loss hack that  nobody talks about. The best fat loss hack that nobody talks about, is create a life that doesn’t drive you to escape through over eating and alcohol consumption. I’ll say that one more time: create a life, that doesn’t drive you to escape through over eating and alcohol consumption.

Because so much of why we seek food out and why we seek alcohol out, and drugs in general, just, there’s no calories in marijuana, or opiates or cocaine. But why w e seek drugs out is because we’re trying to change our brain chemistry, because we don’t like the feelings that we have. We’re trying to change our feelings. Why do we feel bad?

And for most people, it’s, they don’t like what they do at work, they don’t have purpose, or they have too much stress financially, or they’re in a relationship that isn’t serving them, or they’re not getting sex in that relationship.

And I’ll even tell you, I’ve shared this story before, but I’ll share it again. Sex is one of those things, it’s like the ultimate way we connect with each other. And it’s a big deal. And when that goes away, that’s a big deal, too.

And I get the feeling, sex is down, having sex is down. If we’re Americans, even at the younger ages, the older ages. And that was before COVID. COVID has obviously made things more complicated meeting, social contact, and all that, physical contact and all that. But I’ve had so many women tell me, “Oh, my husband wants to have sex, but I don’t want to because I don’t like the way I look.”

I have so many women that have told me that. And it’s like, your husband is stressed out because he’s not getting laid, you’re stressed out because you’re not getting laid, and you feel bad about your body… And I don’t mean to single out women, it’s just a story that came to my mind that I wanted to share because I feel like it’s so powerful here. And so the husband is stressed out, not going to get laid, you’re stressed out because you’re not getting laid and you feel bad about your body.

But since you feel bad, you can’t bring yourself to do anything about it. And it’s just like, go have the sex, you’ll feel better, and probably a lot of your issues will resolve. You’re like, “Oh, gosh, now I have gotten laid and can think straight. Now I feel just like I’m going to eat healthier just because I feel better.

I’m going to go exercise because I feel better. My relationship is better. I’ve connected in a way I haven’t connected for a while because of the kids because of my own issues with my body, etc, etc.”

And I’m using that, because how often do we…? and the sex is one thing, right? It’s like, we feel like, “Oh, I can’t do that thing that I want to do. Or no, that would really make me feel better, because I need to do this other thing first. But I can’t do this other thing, because I feel bad. It’s too much of a struggle.” And what I’m telling you is, do the things that make you feel good, that relieves stress, and a lot of your problems will work itself out.

The point that I am hoping you’re taking away from this conversation is this: number one, s, stressed overwhelmed, crushing like you can’t think straight, something in your life needs to change. You know you shouldn’t be overeating and buying the key lime pie or the Oreo cookies and cream ice cream, or whatever you’re buying, like I was, it’s a sign something’s not right in your life.

There’s a reason why you’re struggling so much. What is it? Is it your environment? Is it your relationship? Are you not set up to win? And really it comes down to that. So many people look at me like how’d you get in such great shape? How did you build your successful business? I don’t try to roll the boulder uphill; I try to roll it downhill. So many people, they’re having Sisyphusian, I don’t know how to say it, like, Sisyphus, the guy who pushed the boulder up the incline up the mountain. I don’t want to do that.

But most people, that’s what they do, I want to make it easy. I don’t have…You probably have more willpower than I do. But I have better awareness of what makes me succeed than a lot of people. And I take action on it to set myself up for it. In fact, I was only going to be here for one month, probably going to be here for two now.

So, I want you to think about; if you’re struggling, what are the things that you’re doing from when you wake up in the morning to when you go to bed at night, think about them. You can even write them down. Which habits are moving you towards where you want to go? Which habits are in congruence with who you want to be, or who you believe yourself to be? And which habits are taking away from you achieving your goals, which habits are out of congruence with who you believe to be.

And then if you’re struggling to take more actions in the positive area, what is stopping you there? Now here’s the thing: you may have to experiment like I did. It took me a long time to figure out, ah, I need cardio in a gym in the building that I’m staying in. Or if I’m staying in a house, there needs to be a cardio machine there so I can use it. That will set me up to win.

Another thing, sun exposure. I need a place that’s sunny. I can’t be in a dark dismal place. Now maybe you can. Maybe that’s not part of your success routine, your success strategy to set you up to win every day. But figure out what is because each one of us has a recipe for success and it’s different for every person.

Now some of the commonalities are the same. We all need social interaction . We all need exercise. We all need to eat more healthier foods than unhealthy foods or more whole foods and less processed foods—might be a better way to say that. We all need sleep. We all need fun/excitement. We all need connection, purpose. What’s missing for you? Because that’s the answer to taking your life to the next level.

And once you figure out what that is, what’s a routine that you can make every day to shift you towards that place you want to go and who you want to be?

I want you to think about that. I’m going to leave. I’ve got to wrap things up now. I’ve got something coming up. But I want you to think about that, what is your recipes for success? And what are you currently doing? Is it setting you up to win? Or are you pushing that boulder up the mountain? And it’s just so hard and every day it’s such a struggle. Figure that out.

Have an amazing weekend and speak to you on Monday!