501: The Number One Thing That You Need To Change To Achieve Your Fitness Goals with Ted Ryce

Podcast Transcription: 501: The Number One Thing That You Need To Change To Achieve Your Fitness Goals with Ted Ryce  

Ted Ryce: I’m super excited to share this episode with you today, we’re going to be jumping into something that is so important. It’s about the thing that I see most people missing, who try to get in shape, and they’re just in this cycle of losing and gaining the same 10 to 20 pounds over and over again.

So, if you feel a little bit stuck in a pattern, if you have a history of repeating a pattern to get in shape, but you always find yourself either going all in and then being all out and you just alternate between those two extremes, then you’re really going to want to pay attention to today’s episode, because this is for you.

And if you’re new to the show, if you’re looking to make an upgrade in your mind and body, for example, if you’re looking to lose fat, if you’re looking to fight off disease, if you’re looking to live a long, healthy life, then this is the podcast for you, you’re in the right place, especially if you appreciate no bullshit science-based information. We don’t just talk about the science like some people do. And we don’t talk about the application like other people, do, we mix both. And that has been my passion for the past over 20 years now.

And in case you’re new, and you’ve never heard this podcast before, and you end up liking this episode, make sure you click subscribe, wherever you listen to this podcast. But just to tell you a little bit about me, for those of you who are new to this show.

I started out 20 years ago as a personal trainer. I immediately realized that it was way beyond just exercise, I needed to understand all the aspects of lifestyle that create health, create results, create fat loss, create muscle growth, create all those things that we want to feel and look amazing.

And in that time, I’ve worked with hundreds of people in person and thousands of people have been helped through the group coaching that I’ve done online and through the podcast. So, another important fact is about 50% or so—and I didn’t count them and tally them and do the statistics, but I’ve have roughly worked with half and half both women and men throughout the years. And today I want to share with you something that’s really important something that I see both women and men do.

And the I’m sure Gisele will make me change the title to this episode, but I initially came up with the idea of “Are You Willing To Die To Get In Shape?” Doesn’t that sound like a strong, extreme thing to say? And you might be thinking to yourself: is Ted talking about like doing one of those seven day a week, twice a day workout programs where I just feel like I want to die because it sucks so bad? Or is he talking about I need to like starve myself to the point where I feel like I’m on knocking on heaven’s door?

No, I’m not talking about that at all. I’m not talking about that at all. You don’t have to do that. But there is something about you that needs to die for you to get out of the cycle that you’re in. Now, what do I mean by that? Because that’s such a weird thing to say, right?

And what I want to say, what I want to tell you, what I want to teach you is that right now, you have these goals, you have these dreams—and let’s talk about health and fitness, although I’m sure you’re interested in much more than that. But this is a health and fitness show for the most part.

So, let’s say you have these dreams, these desires, these goals, these things that you want to achieve, these things that you want to accomplish with your health and fitness, maybe it’s losing weight, maybe it’s fitting back into your clothes, maybe it’s whatever it is. And right now, you—more specifically your ego, the part of you that has these goals, you have these ideas about how to achieve those goals. And you’ve been repeating this pattern for a long time.

Now what does that mean? Because it sounds a little…It might sound a little weird or new agey, you think I’ve been hanging out at the yoga barn in Bali, for too long, getting all spiritual. But that’s not the case here. I want to explain to you what I mean.

We have thoughts and beliefs about where we are with our health and fitness, how our health and fitness affect our life, what we need to do to get our health and fitness handled to achieve our goals.

And what arises from those thoughts or that level of mindset that you have, is the behaviors that you’re currently doing. First comes the thoughts, aka mindset, and then comes the behaviors. And that’s a part of you. That’s a part of who you are right now. And the big lesson I want to teach you today, although we’ll talk about a few things, is that you can’t solve your problems with your current mindset.

Now, before I dive into this, I want to tell you something about what I’m telling you right now. This is the thing that, number one, guys like me, people like me, people who work one on one with people or in groups helping people to level up their health and fitness, this is the stuff that we don’t want to talk about to you. It’s not marketing sexy, it’s not get abs in these seven moves. It’s not eat these five fat-burning foods—that bullshit that you get fed that, “Oh, yeah, I want it. What are the five fat-burning foods, Ted? Definitely tell me about those.”

Or what’s the one weird trick that can get me in shape? What I’m saying now, and I’m so grateful to be in a position in my life and with my business and experience to be able to tell it to you straight like this. Because this is the thing that nobody is going to talk about because it’s really unsexy and it’s hard to sell, it’s hard to make money off this idea. But you can’t solve your problems with your current mindset. You need to change as a person, the you who you are right now, needs to change.

And just to give you an example of this, I get people who sign up to me to work with me in my coaching program. And it’s an exclusive program. I only work with 10 people at a time because it’s very in depth, it’s very…I don’t want to say exhausting. It’s exhaustive, in the amount of work that I do to help someone transform. And I always lead with the sexy stuff, by the way, it’s like, I’m gone do your workout, we’re going to do this great workout, we’re going to do this great nutrition. All that stuff’s important too.

But the thing that I’ve gotten better at with communicating with people and also challenging people, as you know, if you’ve been listening for a while, I invite people to come on calls with me and we dive into this stuff. And the thing that I’ve realized or want to tell you here is that…Let’s come back to an example of a person. So, let’s say a person signs up with me for coaching and they say, “Oh, yeah, Ted, I’m 100% committed.” “Are you sure about that? Are you willing to do what it takes?”

And what do they say? “Oh, yeah, I can follow the nutrition plan, I can do the workouts, I can optimize my sleep.” But when it comes to shifting their mindset, this is the thing that people struggle with the most.

And so, what they show up, they think that I’m going to give them a workout and a nutrition program and it’s going to be this magic program, which, of course, it is. It’s not magic, but it’s extremely well-written and personalized to the person that I’m working with. But that shit doesn’t really matter that much.

The thing is, I can give you the perfect workout, the perfect nutrition plan, the sleep optimization, plan, all that stuff. But what will happen is that you’ll follow it, you’ll get results, and then you’ll slowly slide back into the place that you were before you ended up hiring me, or before you signed up with that personal trainer or with that dietician. And what needs to change there is your mindset. This is really, really, really important. Because I asked people…I’m going to give you some more examples of how this really plays out.

So, people are ready to do the workouts, they’re ready to eat the food, to follow the nutrition program. But I’ll start asking people things like, “Okay, well, you do coaching calls with me when you’re a client,” and some people don’t want to do them. Maybe they don’t like me that much. Maybe they just think I’m good, but don’t really want to hear the sound of my voice. I don’t know what it is. Maybe they think they don’t need it, “Oh, I got this.” Which is probably more likely because if you sign up and don’t like me, that would be strange.

But for people—I’m guessing now I need to ask someone this next time I run into this, but they think they’ve got it: “Oh, I got this. Oh, okay. Oh, I see what you’re doing here. You’ve written this program, oh, I get it. Oh, I’ve done this before. Oh, okay, the nutrition, oh, I’ve done that before, okay, I get all this. I don’t need the calls.” And then when I asked them, hey, you’ve got to show up to the calls, you’ve got to put up…

Here’s an important one. I have people do “before” photos. And you won’t see the majority of them, a lot of people end up not being comfortable with showing them. And if you are a previous client of mine, I appreciate so much, I’m so grateful for you that you felt so good about the experience with me that you wanted to share because some people don’t. And people don’t end up putting up their “before” photos. They don’t end up wanting the calls. They don’t want to work on the mindset stuff.

And here in lies the problem—or there in lies, I might be messing that up. But there is the problem. The problem is you’re willing to do the stuff that you’re already comfortable with. But you’re unwilling to do the stuff that you’re uncomfortable with. And if you’re not willing to get uncomfortable, if you stay comfortable and, “Oh, okay, I’ll do the workout, I’ll do the nutrition routine.”

But if you’re unwilling to do the uncomfortable stuff, right, because I do a lot more with my clients. It’s personalized. And my clients do all different types of things, all different types of things based on where I think they’re struggling and what I know will help them overcome that obstacle. What will help them create a transformation.

A part of it is talking with me. In fact, there’s research showing that the most important thing in coaching is the client’s relationship with their coach. That’s the number one thing in research. So, it’s this thing that matters the most that we don’t like talking about, we don’t like to admit. It almost feels like therapy with a coaching, right? We don’t do therapy on the coaching. But it’s like I don’t want to talk to someone about my stuff.

But that is where your gold is. That is where their transformation is because the transformation can’t happen unless you’re willing to get uncomfortable. In fact, when I get people on calls with me who want to sign up with me, I challenge them to make sure they’re committed. Because if they’re not willing to do the work, there’s just no point in even inviting them to work with me because they won’t get results.

And as, you know, I like getting paid like the next person, but it’s really about the transformation that my clients make that lights me up inside. And I already got paid by millionaires in Miami Beach to show up and be a babysitter for them and to give them their workouts. I’m done with that. That’s why I left.

I wanted to create true transformation, help people level up in a way they’ve never been able to level up before. And you can’t do that with personal training, giving advice in between sets.

So back to you, you need to do the things that are uncomfortable to create true change in your life. And for some of you that might even be hiring the coach, especially for the men. Women are much more likely to hire a coach, admit they need help, etc, etc. But guys have that thing where it’s like, “Real man doesn’t ask for directions, they just get lost, and they stay lost and just try to figure it out on their own and never arrive at where they want.”

So that might be your thing. That might be the thing, right? You’ve been running this pattern for 1, 3, 5, 10 years, and you’re still trying to figure it out, you’re still unwilling to ask for directions, even though you’re completely lost. Even though you say that you know everything about health and fitness, you know all this trivia about nutrition, exercise, but you’re unable to create the results, because that’s what we live in, right? We live in a results-oriented world, the knowledge is worthless without the real-world results. Can we agree on that?

For example, if I say, I’m a great, I can help you invest your money or build your business, because I have a degree in it, but all my clients don’t get results, but I really know what I’m talking about. Then what are you going to pay attention to? Of course, the results. Like, your clients don’t get results, even though you have this degree from this prestigious university and claimed to have all this knowledge, it’s about the results. So back to that one; you’ve got to get uncomfortable to create true change.

The second thing you need to know is that this change can only happen through experience, not more information. And this is the curse of the modern, digital environment that we all inhabit. We sit on our butts and play on our computers for work. And this is me included; I’m playing on my computer right now. This is what we do.

And in this situation where we went to school, and we got a degree because we couldn’t get a good job without a degree blah, blah, blah. And what do we do in school, we memorized a bunch of worthless information, just to get that degree then realize in our job that it’s all the experience. Now, that’s probably a bit harsh, because I learned a lot from going through school.

But the point I’m trying to make here is that change can only happen through experience. Just like it wasn’t the knowledge that you got during college, or your master’s degree or even your PhD or law degree or medical degree. It was the experience. Now, maybe if your medical degree or law degree, you had to know what you were doing, right? But for your average degree, it was the experience of the hard work, of the learning, it was the experience that you took the most out of it.

Because you end up forgetting most of what you learned. Isn’t that true? Do you remember your third year, your junior year in college and all the information you learned in all the classes? Of course not. It was the experience. When you look back on it, what changed you, maybe it was even a relationship with a professor. And that is what we’re missing these days. This emphasis on embodied learning. That’s where Neuroscience is at, embodied learning.

Because knowing and not doing is the same as not knowing. You can get a PhD in how to ride a bike, but until you sit your butt on that seat and pedal and try not to fall over and avoid getting hit by cars, and all the other things that you need to do when you ride a bike, it’s worthless. You don’t actually know how to ride a bike until you get it from experience. And we forget this.

And these days, it’s even a worse situation than when I grew up, and when you grew up, most likely. We have more information than ever. More people are competing for your attention. There are millions of podcasts, millions of blogs, millions of people willing to sell you on whatever information that they’re peddling.

And so, you listen from podcast to podcast and blog to blog, YouTube video to YouTube video, masterclass to masterclass, and you’re just inundated with information. And again, it’s just like in school, you are great at recalling details, memorizing facts, but it’s rote memorization.

Now, some of it, you know, I’m speaking in extremes, I’m sure you picked up a few things that you put into action. But the point is: if you haven’t made the transformation that you’re looking for, it’s because you fallen into the trap of needing more information. And if you fail to get this right, you’re going to be stuck year after year, looking for the one weird trick that will put everything all together for you.

There is no one where trick, there is no magic, missing piece of the puzzle. It is through experience—or if there is, it’s turning off the podcasts and staying off the blogs and putting what you know into action and learning through experience.

The biggest lessons that I’ve learned, with getting results with myself and others, have been through the experience. That’s where this episode is coming from today. So, let’s just recap on the lessons again. So, number one, you can’t solve your problems with your current mindset. You can’t, because everything that you’re going to think of that makes sense to you is going to be part of the mindset that has you stuck right now.

The second lesson is that you must get uncomfortable to create true change. So, all the things that you don’t want to do but kind of down deep inside you probably know you should do. That is where your gold is, that is what you’re missing. That is where your treasure is, in that cave that you fear to enter. And the third thing is that change can happen only through experience, not more information. You can’t do this by information alone, it needs to be experience.

I’ll even go back to the thing that I said before, is that the most important factor in success with coaching, and they’ve done studies on this. So weird, right? I mean, not really. But I think about it, I’m like, wow, all the things that people do studies on, they’re just studying everything. The most important thing is a relationship between the coach and the person who’s receiving the coaching.

So, these are the things that you’re missing. And what this kind of means—to bring it back to the theme that you have to die to get in shape—is that you have to let go of—or I should say it like this, you have to overcome those fears. You have to overcome those fears. Because the fears that you’re telling yourself right now, “Oh, I know I should probably do that. But yeah, I don’t have enough money to invest in coaching. I don’t have, you know, it’s just not the right time. It’s just, oh, I have so many other things going on.”

And what I’m going to tell you now is that there will never be a right time. There will never be enough money. Now don’t get me wrong if you’re student just out of school or you just went through a bankruptcy, or whatever an extreme situation. But we never have enough money. We never have enough time. We’re all in the same boat. It’s when you step up, that all of a sudden, the money appears.

It’s when you step up, that all of a sudden, you make the time. It’s when you step up, when you overcome your fear and step up, that is when the magic happens. And until you do that you will be stuck.

And most of you listening right now, that’s where you’re at, isn’t it? And I’m not judging, I’ve been stuck in my life, too. It wasn’t so much with my health and fitness. It was with my business. I’ve been stuck with my business—thought I knew it all, but didn’t. I thought I was doing everything right, but I wasn’t.

I spent a lot of money getting 1 to 3% better as a coach, and doing the certifications on biomechanics and nutrition and all the other things that I did, because that’s where my mindset was.

I was like, “Oh, I know what I’ll do, because I’m so smart, I’m going to invest, I’m going to get another certification.” I got all the certifications. My business didn’t get better. And then I started resenting my clients—this is what happened to me in my 20s—I started presenting my clients, “Don’t you know how good I am.”

And what I didn’t realize is, the thing that I was comfortable with was spending all my money getting these certifications. And the things that I was too scared to do, or didn’t want to do, like investing in business and marketing information, or traveling and growing as a person. Those were the things that ended up that I finally came around to that ended up changing everything for me.

So, I’m not being judgmental here, because—well, maybe it’s a little judgmental, but what I’m saying is I’ve been there. And that’s why I feel so strong about it. And I see people there all the time. Actually, I don’t talk about this much. But Gisele works with people on this stuff for business, she’s a marketing consultant.

And it’s when you make that shift and overcome those fears, those things that you know you should do, but you just keep finding reasons not to do them. Once you step up and overcome your fear and go after it, that’s when you’ll get what you want, but not until then.

It won’t be another magical workout program, or bestselling diet book that is going to change it for you, you’ll end up in the pattern that you’re in right now. In fact, I want you to think about the pattern that you’ve been in.

Are you the person who’s lost 10 to 20 pounds and gained it back year over year? Are you the person who goes from doing nothing and getting overweight and unhealthy and feeling bad about yourself, to signing up for, “Okay, I’m going to do boxing on Mondays, then Pilates on Tuesdays, then SoulCycle on Wednesdays, and yoga on Thursdays, and I’m going to try to stop eating junk. And that’s going to be my approach.” And so, you go full force, but it ends up not working. And then you go through this all-or-nothing cycle.

Think about your patterns right now. What patterns have you been repeating over and over? And how long have you been repeating these patterns? Has it just been a year or a month? Has it been three years? Has it been five years? Has it been 25 years, like one of my clients, Rich, was a yo-yo dieter for 25 years until he hired me?

Because until we develop the awareness here of what we’re doing, we’re never going to be able to step up, we’re never going to be able to understand, “Oh, hey, this is a pattern I’m doing.” We’re never going to be able to fix it. But we’ll always be busy learning more. And it will feel good to us because we’re doing something, but we’re not solving the problem. But we’re working hard at it, so pat me on the back. Why work so hard at this stuff but you’re not getting results?

There’s no even, need, to work so hard. Just work smart. And until you get there, until you shift your mindset, you’re going to be stuck there. So that’s all I have to say about that today. But I’m telling you this because I care.

A lot of people won’t tell you this, because it’s not sexy. Like I said, it’s not marketable. I can’t make a book…I don’t know, maybe I could make a book. But the point is, it’s not the stuff that resonates with people. It’s the magic workout stuff. It’s the extreme infomercial on TV. It’s the bestselling diet that has something new about it even though it ain’t new at all. It’s just rehashed information because we’ve known what works diet wise for, I don’t know, many, many decades. So, until you make that shift, you’re going to be stuck.

And remember, this matters, this matters and it’s all about that mindset. And it’s really hard to shift your mindset on your own and it’s impossible to shift your mindset without letting that old you die, without letting those old habits that are keeping you stuck, letting them die off and becoming a new better version of yourself. Time to get out of the cocoon and become a butterfly, folks.

I hope you have an amazing week. I hope you enjoyed this episode. I love you so much. So grateful to be here speaking with you and sharing this. Have an amazing week, and I’ll speak to you soon.